Life after 'Spiritual Awakening' (Part 1): Family Enmeshment & Soul Ties (Destiny '9')!
Do you know 'most' difficult part about 'spiritual awakening'? It's 'not' the experience itself which is awfully painful, it's the part where you realize this whole life could have been different. From my experience, I’ve learnt we don't 'define strategic experiences' of our lives. 'Life altering experiences' get arranged @the soul level. Your story may have been written even before you were born!
'Family Enmeshment' has been huge part on my life. I finally decided to write about it.
What is 'Family Enmeshment'?
'Family Enmeshment' is a family dynamic (a psychological concept) where family boundaries are blurred and family members are overly involved in each other's lives. It can lead to a loss of personal autonomy and make it difficult for family members to define themselves outside of the family. I consider it to be an ‘evil, destructive force'. It could prevent family members from creating own lives. If not caught in time, this could lead to an 'end of the family tree'.
I grew up in what appeared to be a perfectly 'normal' family. My eldest sibling, unfortunately , suffered a 'serious injury' in the teens. As a result, the child was bedridden for few years. The child was able finally able to overcome the injury and joined the world. Although child grew into a 'fully grown adult' and had long and prosperous career, the child could not 'emotionally separate' from the biological parents.
I moved to the USA to pursue a MS degree in Computer Science long time ago but 'bunch of bizarre coincidences kept me entangled into my other older siblings life (result of 'Family Enmeshment')'. My older sibling in the USA has had a 'good' career as well. I was born with 'short career and late break up' (as predicted by 'palm reader' in my teen years).
Palm readers do this for a living. I am sure he was able to 'calculate by my life path and destiny numbers by just asking for birth date and name'. This explains reason for 'bizarre look' on his face!
I have never been much of 'numerology/ astrology' kind of a person. I look @the situation and make my decisions. I came to know about things like 'life path, destiny and family enmeshment' in the past 3-4 years as part of the 'spiritual awakening'. I was 'born with life path and destiny of 3/3 which later morphed into 3/9'. It's very strange to see how change of country had little effect on 'family dynamics'? 'FE' should have ended for me at least '6' times ((3) natural & (3) forced) but some 'unforeseen force' has prevented it from 'materializing in my life' (You will learn about it as you read this blog).
'Family Enmeshment is a destructive force that leads to a complete disaster'. 'FE' could be the 'sole' reason the way my life exists today. The 'sad' thing is you could be born with it. Here are some the signs of 'FE’.
Lack of boundaries: Family members have little physical and emotional distance.
Emotional manipulation: Parents may control their children through emotional manipulation.
Over-concern for others: Family members may be overly concerned for others, which can lead to a loss of autonomous development.
Children feel responsible for parents: Children may feel like they are their parents' confidant and sole source of emotional support.
Parents may favor one child: Parents may voice favoritism towards one child.
Family enmeshment can lead to increased family stress and less relationship satisfaction. Children from enmeshed families may have 'an anxious attachment style' and may not know how to handle their own problems and make their own choices.
There are benefits to having strong bonds within family members. Growing up in a close family where you feel comfortable and supported for just being yourself is a wonderful thing. The memories you make with parents and siblings over a lifetime are irreplaceable, and so is the unconditional love of family. However, 'enmeshment' goes beyond closeness. All families are different and have different ways of interacting with each other. Some of those dynamics are healthier than others.
An ‘enmeshed family system’ makes it difficult for children to emotionally separate from their families and become independent people. Families who are too close may be emotionally enmeshed without realizing it. Like most dysfunctional family dynamics, enmeshment is typically passed from one generation to the next ('generational curse'!). Even when they are 'unhealthy', people tend to create same type of family they grew up in because it is familiar. The impact of enmeshment can be seen throughout an adult’s life if they don’t take steps to heal.
The articles below delve deeper into 'Family Enmeshment' issue
Life Path '3' and Destiny '9'!
My 'Life Path of 3' implies 'creative communication'. According to 'pseudoscience', Life path '3' is of an 'artist' (not much of a standard (9-5) job although I have always been very career oriented!) Needless to say, I have suffered serious setbacks throughout in my career. I am not broke but I have fallen far behind as compared to my friends and colleagues at this stage of my life.
‘Destiny’ is the ‘ultimate goal' of life! My 'destiny @birth of 3' = 'career to inspire, motivate, heal and uplift people'. 'Destiny 9' = 'reach higher state of consciousness & help others achieve 'spiritual awareness''. My 'day of birth March 29th' has 'spiritual awakening' written into it.
Spiritual Awakening ---> Spiritual Awareness ---> Life Path & Destiny Numbers ---> website www.divinesoulpurpose.com ---> Destiny
Destiny '9' souls are known to suffer from 'Family Enmeshment'. They have to find a way to overcome it or they risk 'FE taking over their destiny 9= Humanitarian work'?
'Black Sheep of the family'!
In my experience, any efforts to break free from ‘FE’ will meet strong opposition 'from the family (guilt, shame & fear). The ‘universe’ 'creates' family with 'black sheep'. Everything is thrown on the 'black sheep'. They get blamed for all family issues. Financial challenges of ‘the chosen one: black sheep' doesn't help. Family tells 'black sheep' to ‘sacrifice’ for the sake of the family. It tries to take advantage of their destiny '9 = kind = humanitarian nature'. 'Black sheep's kind nature' may also become reason for troubles in the 'real world' (meaning 'short career') unless they build career that goes with their 'true-self = Lightwork = destiny 9'.
'Black sheep' don't stay 'sheep' for the remainder of their life. Some are able to turn the tables. Destiny '9' (like '1..8') has 'dark side'. 'Spiritual Awakening' has everything to do with 'turning individual to the good side as opposed to the bad'.
What if 'Higher self' = Frequency. You ‘tune’ into it through ‘repeat numbers’!
Destiny 9 = To reach 'higher state of consciousness' and help others achieve 'spiritual awareness' = lightwork. 'Higher Consciousness' can be = seeing 'higher self' messages = numeric patterns called 'angel numbers'
'Family Enmeshment & Soul Ties' (Are they the same?)!
When I searched 'google' for 'if FE is same as Soul Ties?', this popped up..
No. 'FE' is not the same as 'Soul Ties':
Family Enmeshment
A 'psychological concept' that describes when family members are overly involved in each other's lives and have difficulty setting boundaries. Enmeshed families can have unhealthy emotions that fuse family members together. This can lead to family members becoming over-dependent on each other and not allowing each other to be fully themselves.
Soul Ties
An 'emotional and spiritual connection' between two people that can be formed through relationships with family members, friends, co-workers, romantic partners, and even pets.
Enmeshment can be confused with healthy closeness, especially if it's all you've known. However, enmeshment can have negative consequences, such as undermining a sense of self, causing depression, low self-esteem, and interpersonal relationship struggles. Setting clear boundaries can help
I intend to explore 'this topic' further next year.
Generational Cycle Breaker:
To be a 'generational cycle breaker' requires
Self 'awareness’
Empathetic 'nature'
'Healing' capabilities
Final thoughts:
I stand behind all my life decisions! My 'life story' is not of one who ‘made wrong choices’. I would argue although I made all the ‘right decisions’, yet, things went 'haywire' that’s explained by 'phenomenon such as spiritual awakening through repeat numbers (aka 'angel numbers') and numerology/ astrology'. If my life hasn't panned out yet as I planned or imagined then it could be because the universe may have had a different plan all along and the 'sync-up' (synchronicity through 'repeat numbers') took a long time or Was my 'spiritual awakening' delayed on purpose?
I have been on the 'spiritual path for 7' years now. Things have yet to fall in place for me.
My life has had (3) parts so far..
Life in the country of my origin: I left it because of lack of good opportunities @that time.
Life in the USA: Marked by 'ups and downs' that includes career and family challenges
Last '7 years of spiritual awakening': Lot of 'spiritual growth' but end result is the same as (2) above.
During all '3' phases, 'Family Enmeshment’ has remained as the ‘constant variable'.
I'll be making 'structural changes' in the coming months! It's 'not uncommon to become lost and/or confused' during 'spiritual awakenings as one’s old self (ego/mind centric) dies as the new version emerges' (This is called 'The Dark night of the soul'!). It's also not 'uncommon' to find oneself in jobs/professions in this time that may not be the right fit in the long run.
I was told to look for ‘new beginning'. I may have found life's purpose as explained by 'astrology, numerology and angel messages' and as written by the 'psychics of the world'. But these are ‘thoughts of the psychics’ (their thoughts have been right on the mark so far).
‘Spiritual awakenings’ become challenging ‘late in life’. You may not be @an age to ‘return back to college’ and/or you may not funds to ‘start a business’. ‘Path of spirituality' can be hard as it may not come with a steady paycheck, 401k and/or heath care benefits.
All I know is I can't afford to be 'lost and/ or confused' anymore!
If your 'destiny = 9’, life is going to be ‘constant roller coaster’ and that's an understatement. It feels like as if 'the world' is against you (that you're a 'misfit'). The 'purpose of spiritual awakening’ is to 'face and awaken world to the phenomenon of spiritual awakening under the guidance of spiritual laws’.
Few 'chosen ones' might decide to 'test the new limits'.
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